Breakfast With a Shaman

Breakfast With A Shaman

I was out of town over the weekend for business. On Monday Morning, I was getting ready for work and flipped through the channels on the TV in my motel room and saw a woman televangelists which caught my attention. She talked about how the mouth speaks the truth from the heart. For instance when you get in a fight and say a whole bunch of things that you "didn't mean" yet there is part of you that truly felt that way?

We all have these moments which got me thinking. It brought back the debate on affirmations versus emotions, the Law of Attraction, and why it works for some and not others. My mind began to buzz with every question regarding this subject that could ever be asked. So I went outside to the patio area that overlooks a beautiful river.. I began to connect with the energy of the river and was soon filled with a quiet mind and much needed peace. . Water always seems to wash and cleanse my soul. Suddenly I saw a woman's body floating past me. I realized it was a vision and something bad had happened to this woman. Then I saw a young boy around the age of 5, in the river. The river had taken him during an accident. Immediately I saw several bodies began to float down stream and my peace was gone. For the first time, I saw and felt the dark side of the river and it made me ill. I didn't want to see it anymore so I went inside and got some breakfast. I was going to take it back to my room, but felt drawn to go back out to the river again. As I sat down , I heard a voice speak to me " Do not hate the river. Just as we take from nature, it must take back, but it duos not choose it's victims". I looked over and could sense 4 spirits sitting in the chair next to me, but only one spoke. He began to explain that there is balance in the universe. There is a light side and the dark side of everything, including within ourselves. He began to explain that the river represents our soul, our emotions and that it is very unpredictable. At times it is calm and peaceful, at other times it can be fierce and destructive. When a rainstorm hits, the waters begins to swell and can soon create a flash flood. I asked the shaman how we could control it.. He explained that we could not control the river. The river is our emotions, the rainstorm is our mind. It is the rainstorm that feeds the river. We learn, not to control it, but allow it to flow, and respect it. If it is a nice day outside and a rainstorm does come, you understand the potential dangers of the storm, so you prepare for it by moving away from the river. He showed me the little boy again, by allowing the river to consume you, you get swept away in the flood. I was a little confused at this point and then it was explained. Your mind is a mirror reflection of your emotions and it manifests those emotions into material things. "like attracts like". Meaning that you can attempt to say a whole bunch of things, but if you don't feel it, it's empty words. It won't manifest , because your emotions aren't there. This is why when someone jokingly says "I'm going to kill you". nothing manifests through that. This is also why affirmations only work for some people and not others. The Shaman went on to say that we should respect all aspects of our emotions, including the ones that we feel are negative. There is always balance. You cannot have just the light and ignore the dark, this will create an unbalance and possibly denial or repressed emotions. By respecting each emotion, when the rainstorm does hit, we are prepared. We know that we should not dabble to close to the river otherwise we could swept away and drown. Yet, we can allow it flow and take it's course so we are no fighting against it and allow it to continue to flow through and out of us. We prepare by simply knowing that this creates balance, we make choices on how we will respond to the storm which allows us to pass through the storm safely. I realized that thoughts do manifest, but only through the catalyst of our emotions, which is why when we are passionate about certain things, it will more likely to happen. It is not the mind, it the the emotion and will behind it. It is not the emotion that is bad, is it how we handle it. Do we respect it and allow it to run it's course and use it to create positive situations in our lives, or do we allow it to consume us? By understanding your emotions and knowing that this is where change truly begins, we are able to learn and grow, and are able to embrace both the blessings and hardships in life. We can create affirmations that truly work, for it comes directly from the heart. We change our thought process by coming up with ways to prepare for the storms. Many thanks to the Shamans in that area for their knowledge and wisdom.

What The Soul Desires

I forgot what I wrote on my last post, but I am taking some much needed quite time before the kids get up and get ready for school. Being that I homeschool now, my time is quite limited.
I wear so many hats and am torn between so many things that I often spend alot of time running around in circles trying to figure out my life purpose. So I often try to do several things all at once. I could literally come up with about 20 titles that would describe what I do, yet none of them really describes who I am.
I started  seriously researching psychic abilites about 6 years ago. It was then when I realized that I wasn't a freak of nature, but finally tapped into the one thing my soul had been running away from since childhood. Fate has a funny way of not allowing us to deny our true selves, no matter how much we try, or how many directions we go, it will always lead us back to our original path.
For awhile now, I have been torn. I have always wanted to have some type of career that made decent money and that made me feel that I have accomplished something. This desire has always pushed me to do more. I finally figured out what I wanted to do in life and the door closed on me several times. As with everything else, is has been a painful process. But as one door closes, another opens.
I have been doing psychic readings for awhile and I have noticed, like everything else in my life, that the fire burns out pretty quick and it becomes routine. I spent alot of time trying to break into the field professionally, and I know that the only thing stopping me is me. I enjoy helping people and have focused most of time on missing people. I don't feel like it is right to be like one of these "big-wig" psychics and charge $1,000.00 an hour for a reading that I can't guarentee will even help them. It just seems wrong to me and takes away the passion for what I do. I enjoy helping people and I know my life purpose revolves around this, but it's difficult when , in the back of my mind I want to be able to make a living. I know it's more then just a money thing, it's a soul thing.
I think part of my problem is the lack of passion. Though the passion still burns, it has simmered down a great deal. I feel a bit detached and ungrounded. I have been focusing my sights on a more spiritual path and who I am as a spiritual being, which has seem to have added to the confusion. Like a pattern of behaviour I always seem to have followed, but this time, the soul won't let me stop. There is so many things within myself, I can't focus on just one thing, it's like I have to do it all, and do it now. I became an ordained minister so that I could properly and legally give spiritual advice, but then it brought on an expectation of being a spiritual leader. I am torn by what the titile represents and obligation, versus the reason I got it to begin with. I'm beginning to understand that I am living to much under the labels and have fogotten how to simply allow things to flow. I think this goes back to feeling to need to accomplish a career, which is why I always feel torn.
I will probebly have more blogs like this, simply because it helps me figure things out. One of the greatest moments I have has that created balance between my gifts and spirituality is the time that I had breakfast with a Shaman. There is a blog about it on my web-site and will probebly re-post it here
I know that I will figure it out and will get back to where I need to be.

A Soul's Journey

Today's been a yucky rainey day which always seems to get me down but always brings an opportunity for some introversion (hmmm, is that even a word?,lol). Ususally when I get things down on paper it seems to give me more clarity. Today is one of those days when I think I could use all the clarity I could get.
  I spend alot of time analaysing my life. As each day goes by, I get older and I feel that if I spend to much time thinking I will run out of time to actually do the things I want to do. But my biggest problem is really deciding what it is that I want to do with my life. I see where this road has brought me and it has been a very long journey. I look at my life on where it is and where I invisioned I would be at this point in life, and it dousn't quite measure up. I think I followed in my dad's footsteps. My dad spent his entire life working towards one thing after another and putting so much energy into things just to watch it fall apart right in front of him. Sometimes, I think that the dreams only live within our imaginations and are not meant to be accomplished.
     My heart bleeds for my dad because I know the sting of failure. I know that his dreams are now dependent on me accomplishing what he could not, but I don't know if I can, for I have spent a lifetime with the same problem...failure and self-sabotage. The demons that seem to pass down from each generation have finally caught up to me and I see it seeping down into my children. The most dangerous kind , the kind that eat's at the soul until there is nothing left but a shell.
  I've spent an entire lifetime running, running from what I really didn't know at the time. I know realize that I run from everything I fear.Ironically, people would tell me that I was the strongest person they knew, little did they know that I am afraid of everything. My stregnth didn't come from my ability to defeat the unknown but rather to hide behind the fortress of steel that I have been building since childhood.
   Five years back, I decided that it was time to tear the wall down and the floodgates , years  of repressed emotions, finally overcame and I have been drowing ever since. Instead of trampeling over everything life throws at me, I now cower in the corner like a small child waiting for the storm to pass.The wall is completely down and I have nowhere left to run and hide. I feel lost and I am faced with the truth  of that which is inside. How do you conqour something you can't see? How do you defeat yourself?
     Not all of it has been a curse, however. I understand who I am now. I understand my gifts are the greater purpose behind my exsistance. I'm beginning to understand that I may not be the person I always invisioned but I am the person I was created to be and all of the gifts I possess are simply manifestation of who I am deep inside. This is what we all manifest. It's not how much money we have or if we become employee of the month, president of the whatever, none of this matter's. We're no here on a life journey, but rather a soul journey. It seems like a very simple revealtion, but when you truly find the stregnth to travel to the depths of the soul, it will seem like the coldest place in your entire being, the darkest space filled with pain and suffering but this is the core essance of who we are, and this is where our beauty truely shines and where our purpose lyes for everyone.And this is the only thing that matter's.

First Blog

WHOOHOO! This is my FIRST blog on Blogger and am so excited to be here. I actually signed up for the account a little while back but couldn't figure out how to change the template and I hated this one, so I ditched the blog and moved on to bigger and better things like YOUTUBE.
 See, not only am I a Pychic but I am also a DREAMER and have spent a lifetime chasing those dreams. I realized when I was younger that in order to make those dreams come true I'm going to have to work hard at it. The problem is is that working hard dousn't always pan out the way we would like, but that's ok because one great man invented the internet and no matter how lame my videos are or how stupid my blogs can get , I will always be a world famous psychic and dreamer..OK maybe not famous, but defeintly worldwide.
    Oh yeah, back to YOUTUBE. So I started off as a talk show for Mystic Realm on Blog Talk Radio, but alot of things happend and I had to stop it for awhile. I recently decided to go back into and I get a message a day later telling me I have to pay if I still want my hour show. If not, then I get a 30 minute show at like midnight!! C'mon, who's going to want a FREE PSYCHIC READING at midnight!! So anyway's, i revamped my web-site and decided to go to Livestream. I wanted to start a show on Missing Children. As a psychic for the group FIND ME, this has inspired me to get more involved. So I spent 3 hours trying to make the show, but every 2 or so minutes the software would go kupooi on me and I was left with several 2-5 minute features on these children. So I chucked the whole idea out the window thinking that the universe had other plans, so I went to YOUTUBE and started my show there. The only thing is, is that instead of doing a show on missing children, I never really settled on a show , so my show, which should be labeled, the "Psychotic Rambeleings of a Psychic" is now a bunch of random stuff.
    Looking back, my whole life is about random stuff, there is nothing consistant about me to incluse my eye color, hair color, skin color, ( you can't see it in the pic, but I have alot of red in my pale skin) and even my spitituality is all over the place. So I figured my blog should be under the same uniformed format.
     I can't promise what will be on here from day to day, sometimes I'm in "psychic mode" othertimes I'm in "haunted mode"  and other times the light begins to shine and I am in 'enlightened mode". But whatever mode I am in for the day, I can promise that nothing on this blog will ever be consistant.  But maybe I will add an Angel Message to each blog, so even when I'm in a "rambeling about nothing mood" there can still be something to it.
   " Ok, ladies and Gent's , today's message is : Spend some time with a good laugh today. Laughter lightens the heart and lifts the mood.
   One suggestion would be to look up " face ecxercises on YOUTUBE. Seriously, you'll be laughing all day and may even get your boss to laugh a little , which is ALWAYA a good thing.

Blessed Be,
Mystic Angel